Since the story hasn’t ended I will be posting the next parts to this story randomly throughout my journal. Be patient with me my friend, It was hard to live it, so I’ll be writing about it throughout the next few weeks or maybe even months.
October 2012 I was living in Norwalk with my dogs, 2 brothers and my mom. One night I got in a fight with my brother, probably about something stupid. I packed up my car and went to go live with my dad, and his wife. His wife left for a few months and came back. Durning that time I was good with his wife. She would give me medicine when I was sick, and even when we would go to Vegas she would give me spending money. It wasn’t a close relationship, but it was a relationship, at least I thought it was.
Summer of 2013 I was sitting down having lunch at my job at European Wax Center in Orange County and I get a call from my aunt telling me that my dad has stage 3 cancer. Looking back I really wish she would of told me that after I got off work. Driving home after that news was horrible. I walked into the apartment and looked at my dad and just started to cry. He hugged me and said its gonna be ok. My dad gave the most awkward hugs ever. He wasn’t an affectionate man. Instead of saying He loved me, he would show me he loved me by yelling at me to put a jacket on, or by spilling out the soup of my cup of noodles because it had to much sodium. Sometimes he would text me about taking Vitamins and even send me a link to prove how vitamins are so good for you.
My sister Golda flew in pretty much as soon as we found out that my dad had cancer. It was 4 of us in the apartment, my dad’s wife had just moved back and my dad was getting his check ups done. Durning the time after we found out about my dads cancer, I was in this bad denial stage. There were times I acted like everything was fine and there was nothing wrong. One regret I have is wishing I spend more time with my dad. I felt like I was acting out being selfish because I didn’t want to believe anything like this could be happening, and pretending that everything is fine is my speciality.
The Night before his Surgery…
My dad, his wife, my siblings and some of my cousins are sitting around my dad’s apartment in Whittier and we’re eating Silver Palace which is the best asian food I have ever had. We have been going to Silver Palace since I was a child. Silver Palace was the best part about going to Church when I was younger.
After we ate dinner we all went to Papa’s room and did the Rosary.
I never did the Rosary really. But when I was little and I would stay at my dad’s on the weekend, he would make me pray Hail Mary and Our Father every night before we go to sleep. Sometimes he would tell me story about Samson and Delilah. Those are absolutely the best memories I have with Papa. Exspecially as a child my imagination was incredible, it was like I was there in the story.
Even now 4 years later I still remember how my dad looked kneeing in from of the altar and having my siblings around me. It was truly a beautiful moment for me.
The day of Surgery…
It was Friday morning and Papa was so nervous, he couldn’t take medicine to calm his nerves and he couldn’t even eat which made him even more so uneasy.
We were all with him at the hospital after he got prepped for surgery. I was able to take a picture of him smiling. Which is a rare thing to capture and I’m so blessed I did.
Sunday morning I get a call from my cousin, and then my sister. Of them telling me my Papa had brain damage and that it wasn’t good. I didn’t understand what that meant at the time. I wasn’t sure if it was fixable or not. I just knew that they had to run a lot of test.
Only 2 days before my dads surgery my Grandma had been sick and passed away. My dads mom passed away when I was barely born but this grandma who passed was his aunt but she was still an amazing Grandmother to all my cousins and I. My Lola Titi had such an amazing life and was a great aunt to my papa. It was devastating when she passed away. It was truly the worst week of my families life.
A few days after we found out papa had brain damage I get a call from my sister saying that Papa will never be the same and that he is in a Vegatated state. Honestly I don’t even remember where I was when I got that phone call I felt like it was a lie, this stuff doesn’t happen! I totally lost it! I then arrived at my Aunts house where I had to have my then boyfriend to call my work and let them know what’s going on because there was no way! I was gonna be able to work after that. I basically had the next few weeks off and it was a blur, all I remember was durning those few weeks I had to drink just to go to sleep. I had my family, friends and my then boyfriend to support me but it wasn’t enough I probably drank 4-5 Strawberritas a night. Sometimes even more then that depending on how early I would start. No one said anything to me, not that many people knew how much I was drinking…
To be continued…